Scripts for Talking to Teens About Sex

Most parents would rather see the dentist than to even think about talking to their kids about sex. Many of us put off having “The conversation” so long that our kids are left to learn about their bodies from what they’re picking up from TV, movies, video games and their friends. This is not exactly the most accurate information and can lead to lots of confusion, questions and heartache.

Let’s face it, we don’t want our children thinking about sex until they’re 35 and paying taxes!  Maybe they’ll be emotionally ready by then. The truth is, the average age of 1st sexual experience with a partner is still 17. That’s right, 17.  So, it really doesn’t matter if a parent is ready to talk about sexuality, because your kids need the information.  It’s better to be a little early, than 1 hour too late.

How do we talk to our kids about sex?  Here’s a secret. Talk to them, early and often. When they’re toddlers and learning how to use the potty, get comfortable talking about body parts, how they work and how to stay safe.

Sample Script

Wow, you’re doing great, making a pee pee on the toilet!  Mommy is so proud of you. After people go potty on the toilet, they need to wipe off their bottoms to make sure they stay clean. Our bottoms are our private parts, and we only let: (fill in blank here with appropriate options, eg. Mommy/Daddy/ Doctor) touch our private parts. We don’t let other people touch them, so if someone asks to see your private parts or touch them, you can say, No.

Sample Script

Gosh, you’re getting so tall. I think we need to get you some new shoes, you’re growing so fast. Have you noticed anything else changing on your body?  Some kids your age might notice that they’re getting:

• Dark hair around their genitals
• That they’re breasts are developing
• That their skin is changing, and
• That they have more body odor.

Have you noticed any of those things?   What do you think about how your body is changing?  Once you notice that, you may also notice:

• Your voice change
• More hair on your face
• More acne
• Wet dreams
• Vaginal discharge, and
• a period.

Then a Brief Description of What Might Come Next

Sample Script

I was just reading in the paper that there were some kids in ____________who were____________. You know, Dad and I think that _____________is a perfectly healthy and normal part of the sexual experience for people who love and care for each other. We just don’t think that kids your age are quite ready for ___________.